September hasn't been kind to me so far. If you've noticed, I rarely write blog posts, it's because I'm always busy with school. I try to exert all my best efforts to get a good grade specially now that I'm about to graduate. So it totally broke my heart to see a failing grade in one of my subjects. It's like all my effort went down the drain. I cried really hard, not because I failed ( I know I can make it up next time around), I cried because my parents were really disappointed in me. Have you ever felt like that? Have you ever cried because you know you've failed your parents? :(
I learned a lesson from that experience, but I didn't expect there will be a greater and more important life lesson to learn the week after that...
Have you ever met someone who- no matter how far you've drifted apart, no matter how long you haven't seen or talked to each other- will always have a place in your heart? Too cliche? yes, but it actually happens in real life. I know so, because I happened to have met someone like that. :)
Backtrack 7 years ago (*cue the misty background and instrumental music*) we were in high school and I- and the 40 other students in our class- had a classmate who was really fun to be around with. Even if we're not that close, I still considered him as a friend. I also happen to like him a bit too. The reason for all my kilig moments back then. He was my crush from 1st year to 4th year high school, and even after that, (before I had a bf) I still had that special feeling for him. That was what I meant with someone who'll always have a special place in one's heart.
Now, don't get me wrong, I am TOTALLY over that infatuation. I love my boyfriend very much and I know he's the only one for me :) There's a reason why I'm sharing to you all this puppy love nonsense.
So why am I telling you this boring and cliche teenage story?
Because that guy, who was a great classmate and friend, died of Acute Leukemia yesterday, September 16, 2013.
Based on Netdoctor website, Leukaemia, or blood cancer, is a disease of unknown cause where the bone marrow produces large numbers of abnormal cells. This means that the normal marrow is pushed into smaller and smaller areas, which results in fewer cells being produced. Acute leukaemia is rapidly progressive if not treated and involves more immature cells. It develops rapidly from the earliest forms of cells in the immature bone marrow cells (blasts). It requires urgent medical treatment but is generally responsive to chemotherapy. (Read more: http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/diseases/facts/leukaemiaacute.htm#ixzz2f8RvcANe)
The news of his death really shocked most of his friends. Even if we are not that close anymore, I still cried because the world just lost someone so kind and good. You know that feeling when you are not in close terms with someone anymore but you know that the world is still a better place knowing that he/she is around? That's exactly how I feel.
I can't imagine the sorrow that his parents and his girlfriend is feeling right now, if that happened to me... If my boyfriend passed away, I wouldn't know how to move on... If I had a son that would pass away at such a young age, I wouldn't know how to overcome the grief.
So, I said I learned lessons from these sad events, right? What are those? Of course, I learned to push even harder and to set higher goals for myself. I learned to value my parent's trust because it is not easily earned.
But most importantly, I learned that life is a blessing we must treasure everyday.
When my grandmother passed away last 2004, I learned that you must show someone how much you love them before it's too late. I learned how to be vocal, to drop all the reservations I have when expressing how I feel and to never be ashamed of these feelings because we never know when the chance to say these feelings will be taken away from us. From then on, I have always worn my heart on my sleeves. I tell my parents how much I love them every time I had the chance. Of course, I never missed the chance to tell my boyfriend how much I love him with all my heart and soul. With the recent death of a friend, that lesson became deeply rooted in my heart and in my mind now more than ever.
To my other half, Jaime, I know you're gonna read this. I love you Jai, with all that I am. Today, tomorrow and for always.
So... these are my thoughts right now. If you've made it to this part of the post, then WOW I am really impressed with your patience and I truly hope you got something out of reading this. :)
Life lesson are sometimes learned the hard way, you get to experience it first hand. You either let it break you or make you.
Yea, life screws us all, fate is playful and unpredictable, but God always has a plan for us. Keep the faith.
In Loving Memory of our Classmate and Friend, Levy Bagunu. (December 2, 1992 - September 16, 2013)
till next time dear reader,
